Everyone Is Selfish
I took an ethics class for my college degree last term, and one of the topics that we talked about was morality and altruism. For some reason, my professor seemed dead set on the idea that morality equals altruism, and immorality equals selfishness. You see, I have always thought of myself as a selfish person, and I am fine with that; but it wasn't until we talked about psychological egoism that I realized I'm not the only one, because according to that view, everyone is motivated by self-interest. Or to put it in a loose term, everyone is selfish and true altruism is just as real as a unicorn.
The word "selfish" is defined as "devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others," whereas "altruism" is defined as "the belief in or practice of disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others." With that in mind, just because someone does something to satisfy his/her own self-interest while also caring for the well-being of others does not mean that said person is "selfish", but for simplicity's sake, I'm going out on a limp here by loosely using the term "selfish".
Yes, everyone is selfish; teachers, priests, monks, parents, friends, Mother Teresa, the most selfless person you can think of. Everything we do, we do it to gain something back, be that physically or emotionally. There really is no such thing as a free lunch. Let me explain that.
I like helping others. I'm a vegan. I love seeing others well and happy. But the fundamental reason why I do all of that is to serve my own self-interest. When I commit an act for someone else's well-being, I feel joy. I do it to sleep better at night. I do it because I like knowing that I at least contributed a little bit of something to mankind. Now some people don't get the joy out off of helping others. But they still do it anyway. They do it to get recognition. They do it to appear kind. Companies do it to make others feel that they're "socially responsible."
I personally know some people who do charity work to get a better resume just case they want to apply for a scholarship or even those who do charity work to get more likes on social media. Have you ever heard of a person who does not get any joy out of helping others help others without anyone knowing about it? Not even the recipient? I'm assuming no. Well, also because it would defy logic to have heard of it when supposedly "no one knows about it".
You might be thinking about a mother's unconditional love for her child and how she would sacrifice everything for her child. That's altruism at its purest form, right? Except she has something to gain as well. By protecting her child even at the risk of losing her own life, she is protecting her lineage. The main goal of any living being on our planet is to reproduce and pass on our genes. Whether we're conscious of that or not, no matter how civilized we've become, that purpose has been wired in our in brain for millenniums.
A soldier goes to war and sacrifices his (or her) life because he wants to protect his country, his family, or simply to leave a legacy for his family to carry on. We all have our ulterior motive for doing something, whether you are consciously aware of it or not.
Oh, and I love talking about this: monks. In Buddhism countries like Cambodia, monks are viewed as the most selfless group of all. Let's think about this for a second; people go into monkhood because they want to be enlightened, achieve peacefulness and be away from all messy human desires and greed. Yes, they give up their lives and freedom...in exchange for enlightenment and peace. Some even do it in hopes that they will have a better life in their next lives.
Do
you follow me here? Monks put their self-interest on the top of the
list, too. Besides, some men even abandon their families to go into
monkhood. Buddha did. He felt awful when he saw human's suffering and
the cycle of life, so to avoid feeling terrible about it, he went into
monkhood. And viola, even though he starved himself and all that, he
wasn't feeling so terrible anymore. Yes, they don't do it for
materialistic reasons, but still, they gain something from it.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to be bitter and say humans are selfish; therefore, we are bad. On the contrary, selfishness is good. In a sense, our selfishness (or ulterior motives) actually pushes us to help others. We help our neighbors because we want them to help us back when needed. I give you a bowl of sugar when you need it in hopes that you will give me a bowl of sugar back when I'm making cookies and can't run to the store.
Our "kindness" is not pure altruism, but in a sense, it helps bond us together and build a community. We help each other because we want to live. At the end of the day, we care about our welfare before others, and being kind to others enhances our welfare. Back when we were still at the dawn of civilization, dangers lurked in every corner. We could be hunted or hurt by wild animals or other tribes. But if we were in a big, collective tribe, our chances of survival spiked; thus, our chances of producing offspring and passing on our genes.
The Time even pointed out the importance of society by saying, "...Our stress systems themselves seem to be designed to connect us to others. They calm down when we are feeling close to people we care about — whether related to us or not — and spike during isolation and loneliness. Even short periods of solitary confinement can derange the mind and damage the body because of the stress they create. And having no social support can be as destructive to health as cigarette smoking."
All I'm trying to say is, selfishness isn't all bad. We all have our ulterior motives for doing something and almost always (and I say this because I'm a firm believer in exceptions), our welfare and best interest is our first priority. It's been wired in our brain for as long as humans have existed. Don't be ashamed of it, but also be aware of the difference between having ulterior motives and doing something in our best interest, and harming others to get what we want.
References:
http://forums.philosophyforums.com/threads/everyone-is-selfish-33531.html
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080120171720AA41nEJ
https://www.physicsforums.com/threads/everybody-is-100-selfish.67106/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_egoism
http://healthland.time.com/2012/10/08/is-human-nature-fundamentally-selfish-or-altruistic/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hide-and-seek/201203/does-true-altruism-exist
The word "selfish" is defined as "devoted to or caring only for oneself; concerned primarily with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc., regardless of others," whereas "altruism" is defined as "the belief in or practice of disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others." With that in mind, just because someone does something to satisfy his/her own self-interest while also caring for the well-being of others does not mean that said person is "selfish", but for simplicity's sake, I'm going out on a limp here by loosely using the term "selfish".
Yes, everyone is selfish; teachers, priests, monks, parents, friends, Mother Teresa, the most selfless person you can think of. Everything we do, we do it to gain something back, be that physically or emotionally. There really is no such thing as a free lunch. Let me explain that.
 |
| Credit: emel.com |
I like helping others. I'm a vegan. I love seeing others well and happy. But the fundamental reason why I do all of that is to serve my own self-interest. When I commit an act for someone else's well-being, I feel joy. I do it to sleep better at night. I do it because I like knowing that I at least contributed a little bit of something to mankind. Now some people don't get the joy out off of helping others. But they still do it anyway. They do it to get recognition. They do it to appear kind. Companies do it to make others feel that they're "socially responsible."
I personally know some people who do charity work to get a better resume just case they want to apply for a scholarship or even those who do charity work to get more likes on social media. Have you ever heard of a person who does not get any joy out of helping others help others without anyone knowing about it? Not even the recipient? I'm assuming no. Well, also because it would defy logic to have heard of it when supposedly "no one knows about it".
You might be thinking about a mother's unconditional love for her child and how she would sacrifice everything for her child. That's altruism at its purest form, right? Except she has something to gain as well. By protecting her child even at the risk of losing her own life, she is protecting her lineage. The main goal of any living being on our planet is to reproduce and pass on our genes. Whether we're conscious of that or not, no matter how civilized we've become, that purpose has been wired in our in brain for millenniums.
A soldier goes to war and sacrifices his (or her) life because he wants to protect his country, his family, or simply to leave a legacy for his family to carry on. We all have our ulterior motive for doing something, whether you are consciously aware of it or not.
Oh, and I love talking about this: monks. In Buddhism countries like Cambodia, monks are viewed as the most selfless group of all. Let's think about this for a second; people go into monkhood because they want to be enlightened, achieve peacefulness and be away from all messy human desires and greed. Yes, they give up their lives and freedom...in exchange for enlightenment and peace. Some even do it in hopes that they will have a better life in their next lives.
 |
| Credit: artistsandillustrators.co.uk |
Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to be bitter and say humans are selfish; therefore, we are bad. On the contrary, selfishness is good. In a sense, our selfishness (or ulterior motives) actually pushes us to help others. We help our neighbors because we want them to help us back when needed. I give you a bowl of sugar when you need it in hopes that you will give me a bowl of sugar back when I'm making cookies and can't run to the store.
Our "kindness" is not pure altruism, but in a sense, it helps bond us together and build a community. We help each other because we want to live. At the end of the day, we care about our welfare before others, and being kind to others enhances our welfare. Back when we were still at the dawn of civilization, dangers lurked in every corner. We could be hunted or hurt by wild animals or other tribes. But if we were in a big, collective tribe, our chances of survival spiked; thus, our chances of producing offspring and passing on our genes.
The Time even pointed out the importance of society by saying, "...Our stress systems themselves seem to be designed to connect us to others. They calm down when we are feeling close to people we care about — whether related to us or not — and spike during isolation and loneliness. Even short periods of solitary confinement can derange the mind and damage the body because of the stress they create. And having no social support can be as destructive to health as cigarette smoking."
All I'm trying to say is, selfishness isn't all bad. We all have our ulterior motives for doing something and almost always (and I say this because I'm a firm believer in exceptions), our welfare and best interest is our first priority. It's been wired in our brain for as long as humans have existed. Don't be ashamed of it, but also be aware of the difference between having ulterior motives and doing something in our best interest, and harming others to get what we want.
Love, Catherine
XOXO
References:
http://forums.philosophyforums.com/threads/everyone-is-selfish-33531.html
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080120171720AA41nEJ
https://www.physicsforums.com/threads/everybody-is-100-selfish.67106/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_egoism
http://healthland.time.com/2012/10/08/is-human-nature-fundamentally-selfish-or-altruistic/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/hide-and-seek/201203/does-true-altruism-exist
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